Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Nearing an End

The last fifteen months have been quite the adventure, heartache,  and struggle.  I have never in my life experience such a level of achievement and defeat at the same time.  Not a day has gone by that I have not regretted my decision, bur still believe it will lead me to where I am suppose to be in my life.  This is by far the hard thing I have ever done in my life.  And there was a large price to pay.  Not only monetarily, but personally and professionally as well.  I have sacrificed much over this time; friendship, family, and relationships have suffered, my job and performance has suffered, my peace and creativity have suffered, but most of my health has suffered.  Both mentally and physically I have taken a sharp decline.  I have pain in places that even my doctor does not understand.

What really has not started to set in yet is that in less than 3 weeks I will graduate from nursing school.  I will forever be done with Baker both as a student and as an employee.  Ready or not I will be "thrown from the nest" and on my own to becoming a registered nurse.  I have some mixed feeling about this.  But I do know that I will be more than happy to be done and that my life will no longer on someone else's schedule.

Furthermore, I have learned a lot during this time... in a few sentences...
I never knew:
I could function on so little sleep.
I would see miracles happen right before my eyes.
I would find my breaking point, yet be able to continue on with success
it would be such an uphill climb, and that upon graduation the journey has only just begun
I could change someone's life
that nurses eat their young.

I have gotten myself into this position, it is what I wanted for my life, and I will be focusing on how to make the most of it!


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